Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
and i looked up. we had an audience...
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
