woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
