My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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