if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
I have post one night stand depression
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
