I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Randomize
