sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
