Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
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