i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
