you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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