Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Randomize
