Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Randomize
