He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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