woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
