it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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