im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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