Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
