My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
