cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
