You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
You're a waste of cheezeits
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Randomize
