we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
You dont lie about slip and slides
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Randomize
