You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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