You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Hippo gnu deer
So squirting runs in the family.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
