hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
