I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
