Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Terrible idea I love it
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I yelled at your uterus for you.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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