This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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