It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
