Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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