So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
He felt like a one man threesome
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
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