I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
