WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Randomize
