Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
