So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Randomize
