I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Randomize
