you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I'm bleeding and have questions
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
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