dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
