i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
