Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Enjoy the penises
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
