school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
