So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Randomize
