bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize
