Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
