at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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