nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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