So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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