I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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