oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Randomize