Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Randomize
