Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
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