is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize