Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Randomize
