Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
