Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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